Yellowstone
20 April 2024
The bike eventually coughs into life at about the tenth attempt. Starting it from the booster had no effect so it’s not a dodgy battery. This is worrying. I call Foothills Motorcycles, the BMW main agent in Denver who move things around so they can look at it next Friday. I will leave it overnight, they can then start it from cold and we can go from there.
It’s doubly worrying as I had no idea how expensive motorcycle maintenance is in this country. A £900 service in the UK is over $3,000 when BMW Chicago do the job, which is where it’s booked in two weeks. It doesn’t seem long ago I was at BMW San Francisco and it wasn’t. But in another two weeks, I will have covered 6,000 miles since then.
These sky-high bills go some way to justifying why motorcycle rental in the US is so catastrophically expensive. It also explains why DIY is much more part of the ownership experience than it is in the UK.
I had planned to go east from Livingstone before tracking back and entering Yellowstone through the northeastern gate near Cooke City. This would take in the Bear Claw Pass and who wouldn’t want to ride a road with a name like that? But Yellowstone is at least two weeks behind where it usually is, weather-wise, and most of that route is still under eight-feet of snow.
A check on Google Maps shows that a reasonable number of roads within the park are clear, so I’ll still get to see most of what I planned to.
The town of Gardiner marks the northern entrance through the famous Roosevelt Arch and it immediately feels like another country. Other than the roads, there is zero infrastructure or development: Yellowstone has been left pretty much to nature to do with it, what it will.
Emerging from winter, there is a barren, almost apocalyptic beauty about it. Bleached earth, bare trees in bright, flat light. The warnings in the guide you are given on entry about wildlife really need to be heeded. Enormous bison wander at will into the road, occasionally spooked into a stampede and you really wouldn’t want one of these coming towards you. Visitors are advised to carry Bear Repellent Spray with them also. I must pick some up at Boot’s before I come next time.
By the side of the road through the Lamar Valley, there are twenty or more cars parked up. People are by the side of the road with binoculars, telescopes and cameras with long lenses. Have I chanced upon devotees of Extreme Dogging?
No, explains a guy stood on the load bay of his Ford F-150 truck with all the gear. On the hillside, a pack of wolves have managed to separate a bison from its herd and have mortally wounded it. They are now circling, waiting for it to expire before sounding the dinner gong. It’s rare to witness and he urges me to stop and get my binoculars out.
It’s a raw, awful sight to witness as another bison looks on forlornly, helpless. Maybe it was the mother…who knows?
The Miners Saloon in Cooke City, the only place in town open, has a Bison Burger on the menu. I was going to have the regular beef version as I saw a fellow bar diner attacking one with gusto and it looked great. But ever the hypocritical gourmand, I have to try the Bison variant. Not nice. Trust me. Pale, fatty meat without much discernible flavour and evidently difficult to cook, as it didn’t have the smoky charring my neighbours did.
21 April 2024
I was woken abruptly at 04:30. Not Fentanyl dealers this time but by my subconscious, and a theory of the possible root cause of the bike problem.
I had fitted a QuadLock charging system and mount for my iPhone. As these devices are now all things to all people, constant use as a navigation aid, a communications device, camera and entertainment source means the battery needs constant charging.
BMW warn against connecting any 3rd party product unless they have given it their papal blessing, which they never grant. So I fitted in anyway and it worked well, automatically charging only when the engine is running. But could it be the culprit?
I disconnect it and the bike fires first time, even though it is -6ºC and was as low as -12ºC during the night, so the oil must be like treacle. The charger must have been introducing some minor interference into the electrical system. Modern bikes are so complex and the electronics so sensitive. I’ll repeat the experiment over the next few days to see if the problem returns but I doubt it will.
Nowhere is open in Cooke City so I exit early and return to Gardiner as that is the nearest town. By the time I get there, it’s nearly lunchtime. There has been nothing for nearly eighty-miles. The scale of Yellowstone is truly epic.
Forty miles south is the geyser basis that includes the famous Steamboat Geyser. It’s bubbling furiously, but as the last time it erupted properly was 1989, it’s a bit fanciful to think it would do it just because I’m visiting. Whale, Wolf and Geyser Watching all require epic levels of patience.
The Norris Geyser Basin, where Steamboat is located, is a series of these fomenting pools. Gurgling away, emitting the stench of rotten eggs and linked via a raised wooden, walkway so each can be experienced with the visual and olfactory senses. Like the giants of the earth exist on a diet of Bison Burgers…
Also steaming - worryingly - are huge turds on the walkways suggesting the recent presence bears, and not particularly shy ones at that. They don’t shit in the woods after all.
Another hour south is Yellowstone Falls and the Artists Viewpoint overlooking the Grand Canyon of Yellowstone they are at the head of. Upon first visiting, 19th-century painter Thomas Moran declared them to be “Beyond the Reach of Human Art”.
Thousands have tried but I think he was right. Even Ansel Adams’ 1941 photograph can’t quite capture the majesty of this spectacle. My modest contributions are below:
Last stop of the day is ‘Old Faithful’. Although neither the largest nor most predictable of the 500 plus geysers in Yellowstone, it’s only one of six that are predicted by the Park Ranger Service and is the largest of these.
Originally, I’d planned to go the day after and hang around for up to two hours to see an eruption, then get on the way to my overnight stop in Jackson Hole. But the roads are still closed south by snow, and the only exit from the park is to the west.
The next forecast eruption was in two hours at 18:16. Faced with an hour’s journey after that, dodging the violent hail storms that appeared out of nowhere did not appeal so I called it a day.
Now I know there is a very comfortable lodge overlooking the geyser park that Old Faithful is part of, the smart approach would be to stay overnight and be sure of a sighting.
The Madison Divide Lounge in West Yellowstone is a smart, modish bistro. All glowing wood, subdued lighting and artisanal looking tiles on the floor. I decide to give bison another go in the form of a meatloaf. Nope. Just the same as yesterday and this is a good kitchen; the starter was evidence of that.
Perhaps inevitably, Yellowstone lives up to expectations and despite the size, is more manageable than I thought it would be to get to the major sights. I’m sure it’s possible to spend weeks there but two nights in the park would allow you to experience its essence. Just leave the bison to the wolves.